Overworked & Overwhelmed: 3 Decluttering Strategies for Exhausted Toddler Moms
When you’ve had an exhausting day at work, giving your all to support everyone around you, the last thing you want to do when you get home is more. And yet…
It never fails (especially on your most demanding days), that that’s exactly what greets you the minute you walk in the door.
Dishes piled up.
An explosion of toys all over the living room.
Laundry strewn down the hallways (what the heck are they doing when you’re gone!?).
And suddenly, that version of you who was looking forward to finally getting home to her family is frustrated, snippy, & annoyed at anyone who makes eye contact.
Instead of hanging out with your family, you’re angry-cleaning, throwing toys into bins, snatching up laundry to shove into baskets, & getting madder by the minute thinking about how this is the literal last thing you want to be doing after being at work all day.
Maybe these are moments you start to think about rage-purging everything (bye bye perpetually dirty kid socks that don’t even have a match anymore!).
Or assuming a new identity, moving to another country, & leaving everything behind (the Netherlands for me, please!).
The truth, of course, is that you don’t really want to take a torch to your entire life.
You just want to be a mom who gets into her car after work & isn’t low-key freaking out about what kind of disaster she’s heading home to.
You want to enjoy the magic moments that only happen when your kids are this little.
Soaking up those snuggles when they crawl into your lap for a story.
Creating handprint paint projects & googly-eyed crafts without stressing out about how much of your (insufficient!) relaxation time you’ll have to spend cleaning up.
Saying yes to an extra bedtime story without feeling like you’re about to lose your mind if they ask you for One. More. Thing...
You already know the benefits of decluttering…but when you’re overwhelmed & freakin’ exhausted it can feel like that life is soooo far away.
I’ve been there. And I’ve got your back!
Here are 3 strategies to help you create momentum in your decluttering journey even when you’re feeling bogged down with life.
Strategy 1: Define Your Priorities & Write Them Down
Clearly defining your priorities is a game changer when it comes to decluttering. It creates focus & boosts your motivation when you’re just not feelin’ it - because when we’re already overwhelmed, the last thing we want to do is think! Writing out a plan ahead of time takes the pressure off your brain.
To get started:
Ask yourself where you want to begin
(You may already know that I recommend starting with the bedroom - so much so that I created a whole challenge around it! - but you can choose anywhere)
Ask yourself why you want to start there & write it down
Write down the impact decluttering this area will make on your day to day life
Write down how you imagine you’ll feel when you’re done
Don’t skip writing these things down! Keep a notebook (or a Google Doc if that’s more your style) & revisit your list before each declutter session. Check-in with yourself to see how your reasons resonate & if you’re starting to create the impact & feeling you wanted to.
Reviewing your list can also help you adjust your approach, making sure you’re always moving towards the relaxed home environment you want.
Writing down your priorities isn’t just about having a list; it’s about keeping your goals in sight & strategically pursuing them.
Strategy 2: Time (& Energy!) Management
Managing your time and energy effectively is crucial for the decluttering long game. Block consistent time in your calendar dedicated to decluttering. Whether it’s a specific time of day or one day a week, keeping it consistent will help you turn it into a run-of-the-mill habit (instead of a massively overwhelming project that your brain has a panic attack about).
Think about ways to free up time. Examples could be:
Someone watching the babes for a little while
Chores or tasks being delegated
Taking things completely off your to-do list (I know, I know - but remember what I said about priorities!).
For better energy management, be gentle & honest about how much time you want to spend decluttering.
Maybe 5 minutes a day is all you can mentally & energetically spare right now. Not feeling up to doing more doesn’t mean you’re lazy or don’t care. Your nervous system is on overload right now, so extend yourself some compassion.
Managing your energy will get you farther than managing your time, so listen to yourself.
If your inner voice is telling you to stop, then stop. There’s no need to push yourself —small, consistent efforts will create big changes over time (& when the process doesn’t suck, you’re way more likely you’ll actually stick with it & achieve your goals!).
Practicing self-respect in this process will change your life in powerful ways that go so much farther than decluttering.
Strategy 3: Accountability
Accountability isn’t just about forcing yourself to check off the things on some list. It’s about creating the best environment & opportunity for achieving your goals.
Identify the resources you need to be successful. Some examples would be:
If you need physical support, who could be available?
Where are you getting donatable donation boxes?
What vehicle will you take to the donation center - will it be available on your decluttering day?
Is the donation location open on the day you want to go?
Specificity ahead of time increases your likelihood of success - you won’t get derailed as easily by obstacles on game day & you’ll feel less overwhelmed when it’s go time.
If you could use some emotional support, here’s some things to think about:
Who can you call/connect with while you’re decluttering?
Who can you decompress with afterward?
What would make you feel really supported after your session (Iced coffee? A walk? A nap? Commit to setting aside time for what feels good!)
Make sure you’re keeping yourself accountable too. Turn off notifications & put your phone elsewhere. Check in with yourself often to see how you’re feeling. We’re most likely to do things that feel good. How can you make this process enjoyable?
Bonus Tip: Celebrate! 🥳
Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they might seem. Even if it’s finishing a drawer. When you purposely notice progress, it has a reinforcing effect in your brain (your brain gets a bit of dopamine & it wants you to repeat the action - aka declutter again!). The more often you take time to create excitement, the easier decluttering becomes.
But a home that supports your well-being isn’t only available on the other side of simplicity. You can create wellness all along the way.
If you’re ready to take your mindset to the next level so you can defuse overwhelm & experience less stress now & during your declutter, I have the perfect next step for you.
Join my free Declutter Challenge!
Straight to your inbox so you can watch (& re-watch!) anytime, I designed this challenge to help you reclaim control & start living the (clutter-free) life you want.
The tools in here are some of the exact ones I use in my coaching program. They are so good, so don’t sleep on this!
You’ll get:
Short daily videos with specific simple homework tasks each day
Mindset tools honed in my decade(+) of clinical experience as a therapist
Exact guidance on the order I recommend tackling your clutter
Me in your inbox for the week to support you with implementation & keep you accountable!
You’ll learn:
How to support your mental & emotional health more effectively as you declutter
How to make decluttering decisions without the drama
What to do if you’re not ready to let things go yet
How to overcome perfectionist paralysis so you can make progress!
Sign up now for the 7-Day Declutter Challenge & get the jumpstart you need to make your simple shift happen.
